A Dash of Plagiarism

OK...confession time: The only part of this post that I actually wrote is this here opening paragraph. The rest of it is just something someone shared with me, and I thought I'd share it with you guys. Being the kind of living-on-the-edge guy I am, though, I'm posting it BEFORE I show it to my wife! Danger is my middle name! (Actually, "Daryl" is, but that wouldn't make much sense in this instance). Anyway, hope you enjoy it!

9 Deadly Words Used By Women

1) Fine

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to just shut up.

2) Five Minutes

If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3) Nothing

This is the calm before the storm. This means "something", and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually end up with "fine".

4) Go Ahead

This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it!

5) Loud Sigh

This is actually a word, but it is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. It means she thinks you are an idiot, and she wonders why she is wasting her time standing there and arguing with you about "nothing" (see #3).

6. ) That's Okay

This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. "That's okay" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. ) Thanks

A woman is thanking you. Do not question, or faint. Just say "You're welcome".
WARNING: This is true, unless she says "Thanks a LOT"- that is pure sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say"You're welcome". That will bring on "Whatever" (see #8, below).

8. ) Whatever

This is a woman's way of saying " **** you!!!!"

9.) Don't Worry About It, I Got It

Another dangerous statement, meaning that this is something a woman has told a man to do several times, but now she is doing it for herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" (see #3, above).

Some Thoughts On Creative Block And The Power Of Audacity

I thought that rather than risk backsliding into AWOL status again, I'd stop by and shoot the breeze here for a little bit. I hope everybody's doing well.

There has been SO much going on, especially in the last couple of weeks, that most of my creative cells or muscles or whatever they are have gone into standby mode. That's not the best thing in the world when you have a number of creative ACTIVITIES going on. One project is a CD, another is an upcoming live solo appearance, and yet another you're reading right now.

There are a number of reasons for this: the ever-present crazy schedule, a recent family loss, and an assortment of smaller causes thrown in for good measure. At least in my case, it's possible to get enough of these factors going simultaneously to just shut down your creative productivity. And it's not that you don't WANT to produce something- it's more that you just don't feel like you have any of it in you.

Fortunately, I've been here before, and I know it when I see it. I also know that it always has a short shelf-life, regardless of how things might seem at a given moment. Living life is about moving on, and by that very fact, it's not a lesson you only get to learn once. You learn it repeatedly, because you're, well, moving on. The good news is that each learning experience you have with this prepares you a little better for the next one, and maybe that's the best thing you could ask for anyway.

Sometimes, the only footing you can find to take that needed next step is the willingness to find a little audacity in yourself and stand on that. That little nugget occurred to me yesterday on the way to work as I was hearing a commercial on the radio. There's a restaurant in Springfield that has a not-at-all humble name: Incredibly Delicious. I've never been there, but now I almost feel obligated to go, because I almost feel I owe them for opening my eyes to this whole audacity thing.

I'm not sure I'd have the self-assurance to open a restaurant and put that name on it. Mine would more probably be called "I'm Pretty Sure You'll Like It" or something like that. I mean, to call a restaurant that, you either have to be able to back it up from moment one, or you've got to be one of the most flagrant BSers to ever draw a breath. Although I don't know this from experience, I do know by their reputation that they apparently fall into the first group.

How great is that, to be so good at what you do that, even when you're on the cusp of opening a new business, you're willing to put a mark on it that commits you to only the highest level of performance? There is uncertainty in ANY new business venture, large or small, but to step beyond that and put that name right out there is a great example of what I'm talking about. If you can find nothing else within yourself, find that audacity and use it for your first stepping-stone. What a thought-provoking and uplifting lesson to find in something we'd normally take for granted!

I hear their bread's to die for, too!